Thursday, March 23, 2006

In Which I Say Rude, Sacrilegious Things

(Warning: Garrett, you may not want to read this.)
I guess this story is heartwarming, I guess, though I think it's really mostly creepy and weird. This woman, Tanya, ran away from home ten years ago and was held indoors by the security guard from her middle school for four years only two miles from her father's home. Then her mother, who told amost no one that her daughter had disappeared at age 14, told her pastor and started praying for her return, and immediately thereafter, Tanya came back.

But I don't know. There are some major unanswered questions here.
1. Tanya disappeared ten years ago. The security guard held her for four years. What about the other six years?
2. How did this poor woman, who is only 24, get white hair?
3. USA Today is definitely implying that Tanya's mother's prayers are the reason for her return. Has this been fact checked?
4. Despite her mother's prayers being the direct cause of her return, Tanya doesn't appear to want to see her - they haven't met up yet. So can her mother threaten to pray to send her back?
5. What if the mother had prayed for a ham and cheese sandwich instead?


Anonymous Andy said...

That's not white hair, that's some serious bleach blonde bidness! Either that or she's a reg'lar ole towhead.

1:30 PM  
Anonymous mr. awesome said...

Laura, I didn't find this post nearly as disturbing as your expose a couple of weeks back on (You know which one I'm talking about.) As Phil Hartman/Frank Sinatra told Chris Rock/Luther Campbell on SNL many years ago, "You don't have to work blue." With regards to the USA Today, it might just be a poorly written article...after all, the only quotes were from the deli owner and the victim's mother's new husband. (Nothing from the victim, mother or father she so desperately wanted to see.) Maybe instead of questioning the mother's faith (although it's beyond me why ten years ago she didn't pray for the wisdom to seek police help in finding her daughter,) you should question the reporter's ability, effort and agenda. Is USA Today becoming the Fox News of periodicals!?!

5:44 PM  

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